Except I did just that with Big Finish's first War Doctor box set. A joyously received Christmas present, this has been devoured twice already. I wouldn't be averse to a third spin before long either...
So, yes, it's fair to say that I enjoyed Only The Monstrous which lived up to my great hope and expectation for this range. Yes Big Finish is increasingly veering into 'New Series' territory and has previously mined unexplored parts of the excellent Eighth Doctor's past but this felt like something different. With the War Doctor, Big Finish is able to explore a world merely hinted at on screen, a character who can be very different to all other incarnations of the time travelling hero and, of course, gets to utilise the vocal skills of John Hurt, no less. The latter alone feels like a huge coup for the audio firm and should be seen as just reward for their hard work in building a reputation over the years.
The box itself should (spoilers further down by the way, sorry about that!) really be seen as one long story, very different in pace and tone to almost anything the on-screen incarnations of the Doctor have done. That straight away shows the strength of the audio medium and of having a very different character to play with.
Disc one - The Innocent - dives headlong into the heat of the action reminding us, if we needed it, that this is an incarnation of the Doctor that is defined by the war he feels compelled to fight. With a nice nod to the Daleks Masterplan, Hurt's War Doctor saves the day while heading to his apparent death. From here on we pause for thought on the planet Keska. Nick Briggs, quite rightly, takes time for us to get to know the War Doctor and the 'state of play' in his life. Hurt is grumpy, irascible and - over time - cheeky, giving us the closest portrayal to Hartnell's original of any Doctor since.
He's rude and troubled - and bristles at the mere hint of his 'name' being mentioned - yet still finds himself humoured by the saintly Rejoice, who nurses him back to health. The pair's dialogue brings out, in many ways, a very First World War debate about war - with the War Doctor feeling obliged to fight, moved to do 'the unthinkable' yet still railing against the fact that many innocent people suffer in the crossfire. He also carries the guilt of feeling that he started it all off through his actions in the Genesis of the Daleks.
The Innocent, therefore, does a lot of necessary character work and is rich with juicy dialogue that flows perfectly from the excellent voice of John Hurt. It might seem odd to start a Time War saga off with not that much, well, war but it works beautifully and you can't help but be hooked by his voice.
The Thousand Worlds is definitely the weakest of the three discs but that's probably inevitable given that it has to do much of the heavy lifting in terms of plotting. The one-dimensional and slightly shrill Veklin is perhaps the only performance that I didn't totally enjoy across the set but, to be fair to actress Beth Chalmers, she's not really supposed to be a likeable Time Lord and gives the War Doctor someone to rebel against and annoy on his own 'side'.
The plot borrows much from the Hartnell era Dalek modus operandi, with a big drill and the enslavement of the population of the previously peaceful Keska. There's a layer of intrigue that builds on this though, with Alex Wyndham's Seratrix proving to be on an unlikely peace mission. The ending of The Thousand Worlds - with the Daleks barking 'peace in our time' - felt a little cheesy and perhaps forced the 'war film' analogies a little too much.
Still, The Heart Of The Battle builds on the hard work of The Thousand Worlds, with the War Doctor uncovering the true nature of the Daleks' plan and exposing Seratrix's hope for peace as folly. The War Doctor's sadness that his fellow Time Lord had been proven wrong - and his grim reaction to the action he had to take to save Keska - showed us that this is still the same character we know and love, albeit buried under the baggage of conflict.
It's on this disc that Jacqueline Pearce comes into her own as Cardinal Ollistra. She's a devilish warmonger and emerges as a puppet master who has been in control of the whole plot all along. Pearce has the audio equivalent of a glint in her eye with such material to play with. At the start of The Innocent I was worried that Ollistra might be a little two dimensional - as some of Gallifrey's inhabitants have been down the years - but my fears were well and truly unfounded by the end. She's a 'baddie and a goodie' all at once and a joy to listen too.
Pearce and Hurt are lapping it up at the end and deliver an electric performance that leaves you wanting more (luckily that's not too far away...). The final line is chilling and superbly delivered. Ollistra asks where she can find our new non-Doctor in future and he replies: "At the heart of the battle, where the blood of the innocent flows and only the monstrous survive." Cue the music. I'm hooked, I've pre-ordered the next one, I loved it. Brilliant.
